Premium Funerals
For The Wealthy Or Generally Ostentatious

 
Situations vacant
 

Fleet

 
Tenpasenta Church home
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  • Make life's final journey better than other people's •

LUXURY FLEET

More tea vicar?
Like most funeral directors, we use up market limousines for that final journey, I guess it's because the bereaved like to see what they are paying for, and we like driving big luxury cars.
All of our vehicles are guaranteed to smell of polish, mainly because we spend more time cleaning them than we do actually using them.
Our hearse service is ideal if you wanted to drive the coffin past your house and impress the neighbours, it's your money so drive the coffin where you like within reason.
We have an additional silver fleet, ideal for those not wanting that traditional black look for their funeral, after all, not everybody is upset to see some people dead, and this could be just the option to demonstrate this, balloons and bunting extra.
We don't have a pink hearse available and never will, if that notion had crossed your mind when arranging a funeral you've come to the wrong place, you may even need serious psychiatric help.
Private ambulance Southampton
   
This site is not suitable for churchy types
 
FLASHY MOTORS
Jaguar Hearse Jaguar hearse
Jaguar hearse silver
Hearse Brands Jaguar hearse on lawn Hearse Brands
XJ8 Hearse outside Premium church Southampton

ROLLS ROYCE HEARSE

We have a few Rolls Royce limos and hearses knocking around if you like that gypsy king cortège look
 

FERRARI HEARSE

Ferrari Funeral logo
Ferrari Funeral Ferrari Hearse Ferrari Funeral
Ferrari Hearse Red 360
Why not try our limited edition Ferrari hearse if you're in a hurry.
Call now for details of maximum coffin sizes and distances that we are prepared to travel from our base here in Southampton.
Prices start at only £500 per hour.
 
R.I.P.
   
  Tenpasenta Church
SAVILE CAR
Jimmy Savile's Rolls Royce Flamboyant show business personality Sir Jimmy of Savile is known for his stylish cars and love of handling the deceased as part of his charity work.
We are now pleased to offer a Rolls Royce he once owned for use in your own funeral cortège, with its colourful history it will make a thrilling addition to your luxurious Premium Tenpasenta funeral.
£180 per hour.
Jimmy Savile's Rolls Royce
     
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  Tenpasenta Church
HORSE DRAWN
Horse drawn hearse It is with great sadness that due to an accident in our yard (caused by a careless driver from Currys delivering designer urns) we have been forced to withdraw our horse drawn hearse until further notice.
Single black horse for sale to a good home or local meat rendering plant, call for details.
Dead horse already processed.
Horse dead hearse
 
Tenpasenta Church
   
 
UPDATE
rent a horse drawn hearse Great news for
lovers of horse
drawn hearses
 
As from August 2013 we will be offering a horse drawn hearse option once again. We have negotiated a nice deal with a local funeral director who is dying on its arse, they have agreed to hire to order this great option, just for you!
£1000 will get you a 2hp hearse for 2 hours, it's great for your dearly departed, great for their mourners who like to pat the horses, it's great for us as we can offer this great option again, and it's great for our rival who can now afford to feed these hungry animals and save them from the knackers yard.
NEWS
Hearse crashed Unfortunately one of our older Mercedes hearses was involved in an incident in June. Although at first look it doesn't’t look that serious police confirmed that there was one passenger found dead at the scene.
The cause of the accident is still in debate with our insurers, we feel it was due to weather conditions at the time, and not because we were giving veteran WWII Spitfire pilot Buster Ball one last high speed run through the southern counties as requested by his bereaved family and as reported in the Daily Mail.
This means some funerals not being attended by intimidate family may be transported to the funeral service in one of our Private Ambulances until further notice.
  As seen on BBC South Today  
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Copyright M. Collyer

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